Jersey Fouls is our ongoing exploration of the rules and etiquette for proper hockey jersey creation and exhibition. If you spot what you think may be a foul in your arena, email a photo to us at puckdaddyblog@yahoo.com for inclusion in future installments.
Good day to you, Detroit! How are things?
Say, remember that Steve Yzerman fella that was drafted by the Red Wings in 1983, played 1,514 regular-season games and scored 1,755 career points while only wearing the Winged Wheel? The guy that's in the Hockey Fall of Fame as a franchise legend?
You don't mind if the Tampa Bay Lightning pretend their general manager actually played for them too, do you?
From Puck Daddy readers Alix and Jason:
We had a blast when the Wings beat the Lighting in Tampa recently. It's hard to say anything about Yzerman is a Foul, but there is something very wrong with this jersey, even if he is their GM.
Love that almost-'WTF?! look the Detroit fan nearly gives as he's walking by.
While we acknowledge the obvious Foul that is wearing the sweater of someone who never played for your team, let's put this out there: Is there any way a Steve Yzerman Tampa Bay jersey gets a pass as a Tribute Jersey?
Consider this was his name and number combo during his playing days and, frankly, it's iconic. This isn't a "Lamoriello $$" sweater; it's an acknowledgment of a player's legendary status and his immediate impact on a new team.
Again, just playing Devil's Advocate here; please understand that before you grab your torches, Red Wings fans.
Speaking of the Detroit Red Wings, here's a Pavel Datsyuk Tribute Jersey, dedicated to his many magical dangles.
Reader Eric Croskey spotted it on a friend's Facebook page; oh, sorry, make that "an acquaintance" because "I refuse to call him a friend after this," said Eric.
Why not just "Datsyuk"? Because everyone already has one, we imagine.
Does the wearer know that, upon first glance, the back of the jersey reads perilously close to "Dangle Suck" with Pavel's number? Probably not.
(Coming Up: The Maple Leafs are stealing your favorite players; Carolina Hurricanes All-Star oops; Nordiques spelling Fail; the rarity that is the Hockey Bag Foul; the Islanders have been bad for a really, really long time; a World Juniors Canada Foul; several terrible '69ers'; and someone who will not be voting for Corey Perry to win the Hart.)
And here … we … go.
From reader J.K. Hall:
Jersey foul from Colorado. I wonder if he thinks he's wearing Paul or Peter's jersey. Obviously, he doesn't know how to spell his "favorite" player's name.
Or perhaps this is just an acknowledgment of his big offensive numbers with Les Nords.
You know, his "stats." As in "Statsny." No, we're pretty sure he's not that clever either.
Right here is an image of Carolina Hurricanes goalie Cam Ward in the 2011 NHL All-Star Game. Please note the color of his jersey, and the fact that looks nothing like the one above. From Cam in Raleigh (wait, it can't be THE Cam in Raleigh, could it?):
I've been a big fan of your Jersey Foul blogs for a long time and I just have never gotten the chance to see a foul in person until now.
This was taken at a Hurricanes game vs. Buffalo. Sorry about the shakiness I just couldn't resist taking a photo of this. He had a following of about 10 people trying to take pictures of his jersey. I feel kind of bad for the guy, he probably bought a blue one thinking it would be sweet to put Wardo on it way before the teams were announced!
The NHL All-Star Fantasy Draft: The bane of both Phil Kessel's and The Premature Jersey Purchasers' existence.
Interesting Foul from the World Junior Championships, which began with a Canadian invasion of Buffalo and ended with euphoric Russian kids too drunk to fly. From reader Artigas:
This dude is wearing a NJ Devils jersey that he had modified. The Devils symbol on the front had been covered with white stick tape to form a Maple Leaf, but he's a Canada fan wearing an American based team's jersey... Ugh, and that helmet... double fail.
There's something vaguely punk rock about taking another sweater and taping a maple leaf on the front of it. It would have made more sense here to do it to a Team USA jersey, as being symbolic of the Canadian takeover of the Sabres' arena.
But the helmet … yeah, that's a Fail. Unless he has a massive head wound. Or he's John Olerud.
To: The Toronto Maple Leafs
From: The Calgary Flames and the New York Islanders
Memo: This is completely unacceptable. WHY CAN'T WE HAVE NICE THINGS TOO?!
Unless, of course, it's a harbinger of things to come with John Tavares, perish the thought ...
(Iggy from Lindsay, Johnny T. from Evan Pivnick.)
Speaking of the New York Islanders, founded in 1972, here's reader Kara on this No. 72 jersey:
I know. I understand that the Isles were really bad in '72. Like really bad. But to put the equivalent of "BAD 72" on your jersey... it's not like they're any better now.
But hey, at least the dude knows some Italian.
As a side note, he was called onto the ice during the first intermission for a fan promotion. I didn't stick around to see if he won, but with that jersey, he certainly shouldn't have.
"Cattivo" meaning "bad" in Italian, you see.
So we're figuring this is some kind of Tribute to the 12-60-6 Islanders from 1972-73. Unless it's a Protest Jersey against the Islanders' only Nos. 72: Ron Hextall and/or Mathieu Schneider.
We've received several notes and photos on this Duncan Keith/Brent Seabrook Chicago Blackhawks Tribute Jersey, which makes us suspect we haven't run it before.
It's a little clunky, because Keith's name is above Seabrook's number. Also, it sucks that whenever the team is struggling, Joel Quenneville breaks up her sweater.
(Thanks to Sam Cain for the image).
We don't traffic too often in '69' jerseys, because (a) there's a disturbing number of them and (b) they usually rank somewhere around Carlos Mencia starring in a remake of "Arthur 2: On The Rocks" on the humor scale.
Nonetheless, reader Mike Serven has a story to tell about Stinky and his Vancouver Canucks jersey at a Phoenix Coyotes home game:
The story according to the jersey owner is that "Stinky" (pronounced Stin-kay) represents a guy that played one game for the Canucks (I searched but couldn't find the player he is referring to) and the number 69 is the year he was born. A Dennis Miller stretch of a reference that results in a jersey foul that takes 5 minutes to explain.
Interesting note is that this guy flew down from Vancouver just to see the game because the tickets are so much cheaper.
We respect anyone who creates an implausible backstory for their Jersey Foul.
Meanwhile, other '69' jerseys are a little more risqué …
Oh, for the love of … 'Jordan888' sends in this deplorable Foul from the Edmonton Oilers, in which the colors Gretzky and Messier and Kurri and Boris Mironov wore so proudly have been reduced to being the host for innuendo.
Couldn't spring for that extra 'X' to really get that point across, eh?
From the Boxx to the Bag:
This may be a first for the series: The Hockey Bag Foul. Please allow Sean Streicher to explain:
So it may not be a jersey but I found this bag in Walmart. It's a Flyers bag with Pittsburgh penguins printed on the side. All of the other bags were done correctly with Philadelphia Flyers printed there.
It's a hockey bag fit for Arron Asham! Or a bonfire.
Finally …
Take it away, 'Thebigjt2000' on this Corey Perry/Anaheim Ducks Foul captured at Honda Center of all places:
Sorry the shot is a little blurred, but the jersey reads "FAIRY" with a crossed out Number 10.
For starters, It's a rather weak Corey Perry insult of the very basic schoolyard variety. So, no points for creativity. But you look even dumber when Perry scores a hat trick and his 50th while you're wearing it.
Then, I'm not really sure the symbolism of the 35 that he was sitting on. Was it a longing for Nabokov circa 2000, or maybe a late tribute to the 06/07 Vesa Toskala?
So you're saying this might be a Foul then?
Boy, now we're really regretting Sidney Crosby's injury: Not only might Perry win the Hart Trophy that seemed predestined for Sid, but now he's catching up on the Most Emasculated NHL Star leaderboard.